Bizzare Tale of the Crushed Dog...

Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009....as told and seen by one my son's...

"The Bizzare Tale of the Crushed Dog..."

Awaking to ugly and ominous skies this morning one could see the day was not exactly going to bring about sunshine any time soon...but the tales it spun were also unreal..

Reports from all around town and the effects of the storm were almost hurricane like! The damage to trees and property were pretty surprising...but none as bizzare as what I am about to tell...

High above the ground on the balconcies of one of Miami's many spectacular high rise condominuims, the wind was causing all kinds of havoc. Plants and furniture were being tossed around like paper. Way down below on the surface of the earth was a man walking his dog. Out for what one must imagine was their everyday routine only this day it would be anything but...

Unexpectedly and with no warning...my son sees a patio table being lifted up by the wind from one of the balconies way up top and ejected over the balcony...he watched as it swiftly fell to the earth...he watched as it landed...RIGHT ON TOP OF THE DOG! Splat...blood everywhere...it's owner devastated....poor dog....

Bizzare, very bizzare if you ask me....but also very, very lucky for the dog's owner! It could have just as easily been him....

Halloween foods that are as much treat as they are trick...

It's over! My annual Monster Bash has concluded...and as promised, here are pictures of just some of the tasty tricks my guests were treated too! Please know that I did not create these recipes, I just simply thought up new ways to serve them up for this holiday. Most of the serving ideas are mine with the exception of one or two, like the skelton filled with "intestines". I wish I had thought of that one but I didn't and I would love to give props to whoever did! However, I did elaborate on this idea by serving it up in a coffin, adding the snake and the sign!!

I hope my love of Halloween and these pictures inspire you as I have been inspired by others to try something new for your Halloween party!

Appetizers

This is nothing more than spinich dip served up in a hand mold and garnished with a gummy bat. Everything but the plate and spreaders are edible!!

This is a very tasty and quickly snapped up, shrimp mold recipe garnished with a gummy snake. It was gone before it hit the table! If you are short for time, you can do like I did by making this 2 days ahead, tightly wrapping and freezing. Thawing out will take a good couple of hours.

Entrees

"Pumpkin spice" and "Dates" Quick bread mixes baked in mini pumpkin molds make for a nice alternative to the dinner bun and a boo-licious treat!

"Sewer Rat Delight" (this recipe and idea are all mine!!) These bone shaped, bite size treat were made with my usual meatloaf recipe and cut out with a cookie cutter, served up on a this cute platter and garnished with a gummy rat. These can be made a day ahead and reheated the day of your party.

"Aged Intestines" served up in this rubber corpse along with a gummy snake was the hit of the party! The sausages looked gory enough but were fantastic to eat if you dared!

Desserts

My twist on cheesecake!! Goblin Hearts and Yummy Mummy Brains are easy to make and great to taste. The cheesecakes have been garnished with frozen cherries, strawberries, strawberry jam and gummy spiders. These can also be made and frozen up to 5 days ahead!!

Finally, while I served up a lot of other creepy, gross foods at my bash, these witches fingers are always the talk of the party and have come to be one of the foods my guests always ask about. My recipe is just one of a million out there for this treat but over time I have learned to tweak the cookie enough to make it my own!

Truth be told...

I've been cooking and baking and baking and cooking now for a week! And while it's been crazy tiring by day's end, it's also been tons of fun. It's taken some experimenting, brave tasters and tossing of some bad batches but overall I have been able to adapt some of these recipes to get the results I wanted. Gross but yummy foods!!

And so....I've got cheesecake brains and hearts. I've got cookies that look like bloody witches fingers, decadent chocolate coffins and a kitty litter cake served up with a scoop if you've got the stomach to try this tasty treat!!

I've made a shrimp mold, a spinich dip monster hand and a cheese dip made into eyeballs that will have my guests staring them down and then some!! You'd think I was done by now but nope, there's more to cook up! I love to shock and thrill my family and friends while treating them all to deviliciously fun foods. So I'll cook and bake some more all in the name of a delightful and memorable time.

And so with my bash near and almost out of time even though my mind is racing with more ideas than I can execute, its time to get some rest!

Finally, I'll be taking pictures of all these goodies as soon as they have been proped and served up! In the meantime, here is a picture of my "Pumpkin gone Ugly" .... apparently decorating cakes is not my thing...

Dinner is served. Please be seated....

Let the Monster Bash begin!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally, the party approaches and I have begun to prepare. I am decorating day and night, inside and out. Every spare moment in the day spent transforming my house away. I've posted pictures of what it's starting to look like around here!!

It's taken me years of collecting props and experimenting with many ideas to achieve this Monster Bash. Each new Halloween brings the excitement of making it all look different and new. Executing the entire event takes some planning and lots of energy but it always turns out to be a blast for my family and myself! I hope you enjoy my ideas. Please feel free to use some of these ideas at your own Halloween Spook-ta-cular!!!!!

Dinner for 4.

Begin my placing blood stained burlap fabric on table. Set table as creepy as you like for your headless dinner guests!

Spiders Alive!

Weave a web and add an oversized spider to any area in your home. Embellished with bats, lights and creepy music for hairy surprise!

I see you...

These eyes light up and have a mind of their own as they tell it as they see it!

Halloween Hello

Greet your guests with this very simple set up at any front door or place in any other appropriate area. The scary face in the mirror asks people to come in closer for a better look at them...until he nearly SCREAMS them to death!

Coming up next.......

Pictures of some realllllllll nasty looking but veryyyyy yummy tasting foods for the party...

I love Halloween...can't you tell?

Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble (or something like that!)... All I know is I've been plotting and planning my Halloween menu for my annual and most likely last monster bash. But that's not why I'm here. I'm here to share my goody list with you all!!!! Some of the recipes you may already be familiar with but rest assured I've given them some twists of my own. All of the items I serve are named and displayed using a variety of vessels in very creative ways. NOTHING says creepy food like the right presentation! So without further ado...here is my

2008 Monster Bash Menu

Appetizers

Eerie Eyeball (cheese) Dip

Smashed Zombie Dip served with Spooktacular Crackers

Vampire Splatter Dip served with Skin Flakes

Breaded Vomit Bites

Guts in Blood

Bizarre Brain Pate

Boo-licious Bread

Entrees

Bone Crunching Bites served with Red Slimy Goop

Aged Gut Intestines

Dirty Bat Wings

Rat Sewer Delight

Black Ants & Beetles

Desserts

Sinister Eyeball and Ghost Trees

Kitty Litter Cake

Witches Fingers

Death by Chocolate

Toxic Sugar

Draculas Daily Special

Madman's Pumpkin Treat

Killer Candy

TADA! Lots of food...lots of work...but I love it! I'm still working on my liquor list but one thing that is always present at my bash is my "Cursed Margarita". Served straight out of a bleeding zombie head!! Your guests won't know what to think except that they want one!!!!!!!!

Ok..that's all I have time for. If any of you want to know more about how to present, prepare or get recipes for anything on this menu and can't wait for the party pics, (I promise to post them BEFORE Halloween since my party would have happened by then) please drop me a note or comment and I will be glad to elaborate on ways to creatively serve up a super spooky and gruesome table of gross but delicious food for your guests to ooohhh and ahhhhh over! Making you the king or queen of your party for sure!

CraZy is as CraZy does...

and so it goes.... I have begun my pre-pre-pre preparations for Halloween and I'm still looking for some tips and suggestions...but in the meantime...I've been coming up with some of my very own clever ideas and thought I'd share...

Last year, I made rats out of meatloaf. They looked spook-ta-cular and everyone cringed at the treat only to find it extra tasty. They are easy to make. If you want to know how to make this or anything else I talk about, drop me a note, I'll tell ya!

This year however, I am going to give my meatloaf a twist! I am going to cut bone and cat shaped pieces out of the meatloaf and serve on a platter around a big ole'talking rat. It's a sneaky surprise as this rat scolds my guests when they reach for a bite of this delight!

Another clever idea I've used over the years and will expand on this year is my "Crying Margarita Head" Long ago, I purchased a zoombie head with neck that sits in it's own bowl and was meant to pour out fake blood from it's eye's, ears and nose. Instead, I make my favorite margarita mix and it cry's drinks for all my guests to indulge in! A scary but tempting surprise!

This year, in addition to this favorite, I will be serving "intestines" out of a plastic skeleton. A conversation piece for sure!

Ok...back to scheming and planning I go. If you're interested, I will be posting up pictures as I go along. Two weeks or so from today, we begin to build...muahahahahahaha!

I know it's nuts...it's only August...

But hey....gotta get going if the party is gonna happen. What party you ask? Why Halloween of course!! Love it. I've been doing this holiday my way for years. It all started out so innocently. A few kids, a few treats, some games. Eventually adding a front lawn cemetary and more creepy foods to eat was just natural progression. With each passing Halloween, my parties have grown larger and my creativity has soared to new heights!

The last 7 years or so I have been hosting what has now come to be a staple in my home every Halloween. At one point I opened it up to the neighborhood for a couple of years only to be amazed at how as many 300 or more stopped by and loved it! The world had spread like wildfire and everyone wanted to see! Unreal! And even though my sons are all but grown, they still insist on the party and are willing to help create our haunted house and fabulous party.

So while it is only August, October is right around the corner and the work must begin. It takes nearly 2 months to prepare and execute this event. I begin by converting an outside area of my home into a "house" of sorts (if you need ideas on how, ask me!). This is just the beggining of the bash! All guests are required to enter through this haunted house in order to enter the party. It adds the element of trick before treat and everyone loves it!! And the party?? Well that rocks!

Once inside, my guests are treated to all kinds of goodies they simply can't believe. The music, the lights, the smoke, the creepy, creepy foods (I need more ideas) all make for the best Halloween magic! Some of my guests have actually been to afraid to eat some of the foods I serve until someone else tells them how yummy it is!!!!!!!!

So as you can see, I need be a busy little bee. And while I have all kinds of goodies to incorporate this year, I would love to see if anyone has some fresh ideas out there. Anyone?? Hope to hear from ya'll....and muuuhahahahahahaha

Life is crazy...

As I go about my day and help out one of my son's with his laundry, I find myself thinking just how crazy life is. One moment your children are small and life is chaotic. The next thing you know, life is still chaotic but now your son's jeans are larger than you are. What the heck? I remember well the day this child was born. He was pre-mature and fit in the palm of my hand. Matter of fact, his arm was as small as my thumb! His first clothes were purchased at Toys R Us and were Cabage Patch Doll clothes!! Nothing else fit!

And now??? Holy cow! This boy is now a man and he is a large man! I never, ever imagined it. Actually, I never gave it any thought. At 19, he is 6' and 220 lbs or so! Crazzzzzzzzyyyyyyyyy. Some days I think it's the extra attention he got as a baby. All the extra nurioushment it took to insure his survival. My goodness, what madness in those days! How very litte he was. How much he needed. Then my brain says..."Pssstttt, hey! Remember? MOST of the men on my side are tall, tall, tall! Dad's not exactly short either and I go DUHHHHHHHH!! But still, how did he get SOOOOO big, so quick????

Going back to my chores, I am still and always amazed at life.....and so....back to doing his laundry I go....

As my mind continues to ramble...........

Tracking Fay Crazies

NEWS ALERT!!!! Tropical Storm Fay approachs South Florida! Read all about it! Read all about it!! Crazy weather, crazies everywhere! As a South Floridian I am used to hurricane season and all that it brings...but people watching during theses storms is as interesting as keeping an eye on the system itself!

As per usual, local channels are flooded with reports of the storm but one of the wildest report is the one of the surfers out at Haulover Beach! I can almost hear the surfers "Awesome waves dude!" The swells are excellent and more surfers arrive. Then more reports from the beach. The surf is gettting rougher and it's become time to close the beach. Get all the surfers out of the waters. Cut. Next story. NOW, back to the beach and a handful of surfers are still in the water but are now racing to get OUT. Crazzzzzzzyyyyy! Seems Fay's feeder bands are now too strong to surf in at all....still some surfers linger..hoping....

Flipping the channels, it is being reported that at Fort Lauderdale Beach some folks are still trying out the surf and then some! Seems one guy thought it would be really, really good weather for KITE surfing. Boy, was he wrong! A sudden gust of wind picked him up and slammed him all the way accross the street into a building! A-yup. You read it right. THUD! Right into the side of a building. Luckily "Fay" was just warning him. He's injuries were minor as he reportedly told paramedics he was ok while being transported to the hospital anyway. Coo-koo! Coo-koo!

Then there is the madness that extends beyond the beach into the suburbs of South Florida. As I set out to run an errand before the day deteriorates, I notice an obviously homeless man by the side of the road. He is shirtless, dirty and looks totally demented. He is camped out and taking shelter from the rain under a beach umbrella. All his worldly possessions in a shopping cart. He is totally out of place in this area! Hmmmmm...anyone tell him Fay is on it's way????

And it gets even nuttier. People scurry around like mice in a maze racing to gather supplies in case the storm does damage. Gathering what??? As a long time resident, I think it rather crazy not to be prepared! How can you not be! With a few simple rules I keep my insanity at a minimum during these storms. I stock and rotate water, powdered milk, instant coffee, canned goods, meds and whatever else is necessary to survive as a part of my regular grocery shopping routine. I have collected candles over the years with each passing storm and batteries are always in the drawers. Portable radios, first aid kits and generators should be staples in every South Florida home! The only thing left to do is insure a full tank of gas in the car. Not so hard! Not so necessary to break the bank and your budget. And a great way to stay out of the insane asylum at these times!

Finally, after what turns out to be a very long day of news watching and storm tracking, we are still tracking Fay and her path is not quite clear. She is doing this and she is doing that. With chances of strengthing and tornado activity threatening out night, Fay is for sure one of the craziest storms I've seen in a while.

Summer time is driving me bonkers already!!!!

Ahhhh Summer..so sunny, so beachy hot, rainy days and school breaks! What a way to go completely bananas as I am torn between wanting to play and having to work. It's not fair I say! I don't even have time to feel crazy...............it's totally insane!

I love...no wait...I NEED my peace and quiet at least for 5 minutes a day or I am one cranky contender. Nothing drives me nuttier than the inablitiy to hear the madness in my head! Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the company of my teenagers and their friends. [Goodness, my food bill should have the grocers rolling out the red carpet for me!] But some days, I just want my money and my house back! Especially the money! Boy oh boy, is it me or does it cost an arm, a leg and your first born to feed growing kids these days???????

So as back to school quickly approaches, I am grateful for the memories but I sure will be happy with the extra time to think...think...think....so I can stay out of the looney bin. Thanks for your attention and please, share your madness with me...

Marriage is not an easy thing....

IF I've said it once... I'll say it again...

"Women marry in love and men in lust and with the years, women fall out of lust and men fall in love and it takes a strong bond, true respect for each other and a sense of humor to make it through til death do us part."

Property of and Copyrighted by LisaGoesCrazy. Please do not use for any purpose without written consent. Thank you.

Another nail salon, another nightmare...

I don't know about you but I want pretty, healthy feet and hands especially if I am going to pay an arm and a leg to have them done!!! And since my last few experiences with nail salons were a nightmare for the most part, I thought I had given up on them. Unfortunately though, it seems my need to be groomed combined with my bad eyesight do not go hand in hand with doing my own mani's and pedi's. But even worse, with a very special occasion coming up, I really needed my hands and feet to look nice. What to do? What to do?

I know! Having noticed the opening of a brand new salon in the neighborhood, I hop in my car and off I go to see if maybe it'll be different this time. It has to be! It's new! No germs at the very least!

Well, I wasn't disappointed. Not initially anyhow. It is a beautiful salon. The owners have done an impressive job of creating an upscale nail salon with all the latest gadgets and furnishings. I must say from the tasteful decorating and lighting to the complimentary snacks, water, soda or wine, the staff is courteous and attentive. They seem to have the concept right, women seem to be streaming in and they have an edge over their competitors by offering services like a deluxe pedicure!

A deluxe what? Wow....sure! How much?? $32??? Ahhhh...well... Say what? I get to pick out my own flavored scrub? Cool. Warm towels...fantastic! A bit steap but hey, surely at these prices I'm bound to not catch any fungus or nasty something or other, RIGHT? Especially since, I have met the owners and expressed my compliments for such a nice salon, great service and I left a super excellent tip! Great! Fantastico!! Yipeeee! Happy with my mani and PEDI, I take leave, promising to be back.....

As promised, soon as my feet need another pedi, I return. Goody! This feels like a mini-spa for my aching, tired feet, I can't wait to sit down and relax. Take a load off! And I do. Once again, happy....I found a new place....I finally found a new place! HA!!! OH NO I DIDN'T!!

What I finally found was FUNGUS! A-yup!

Right under my nail. Here's where I go totally wacko! Somebody please, please, TRIPLE please, tell me, why would anyone invest such a large sum of money in a business only to lose customers due to a lack of hygene and the spread of such a nasty bug? It seems totally insane to me! Not to mention completely gross! THAT'S IT! I'M DONE! I'll get the brightest light bulb I can find and do my own freaking nails! Not only will they be healthier, but I will be richer!!

Which brings me to this....ladies...besides the nasty germs that are present in uncleaned tools and tubs, have you ever considered what else lies in those nail (drill ones too!) files that are used over and over again from customer to customer? Have you ever considered how cells are being transfered from others to you and vice versa via the bloodstream? What kind of crap are we exposing ourselves too?? Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww!!! I must admit, while I had already begun my disenchantment with nail salons, THIS realization and the fungus under my toe nail is enough to keep me out all together!

Has fungus in a nail salon been an issue for you? What did you do about it? Are you done with salons???

Hmmmmmmmm.....

Alrighty now. Prompted by an article I read, I recently posted a blog regarding breakfasts and the different kinds of foods out there for this particular morning ritual. I only got (1) one comment. A very tasty one I might add. Amazing that I did not get anymore comments though. I thought for sure this post would provoke some suggestions and provide new ways to eat the first meal of the day. But, nope. Nothing. I am boggled. Yes. Boggled.

Surely there has to be as many kinds of "breakfasts" as there are cultures and countries. Isn't there? Where are they? Who is eating what? An inquiring mind wants to know....please, help quiet my brain...thank you.

To egg or not to egg....

Here's a riddle. What's crazy to some people first thing in the morning but is totally normal to others?? Tic toc, tic toc. What can it b? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... Ok. Alright. I'll tell you.

THE KIND OF BREAKFAST you consume! What is the norm for you is not so for others. I first discovered this when I visited Hawaii and found they serve among other things, RICE for breakfast at McDonald's! I was surprised. I don't know why though. I grew up eating rice and fried eggs from time to time for dinner but I guess I never thought to have it for breakfast! Crazy!

And then I found an article on how different breakfast is around the world and eating in the morning has now taking on a whole new meaning! It doesn't have to be BACON & EGGS!! or PANCAKES!! Now I can opt for mmmmm....yummy, yummy "churros" with hot chocolate for dipping as they do in Spain, grilled kippers (smoked herring) and poached eggs like in Scotland or I can have my left over spagetti on toast as they do in Australia! Who knew? This has sparked a whole new madness in me. I no longer have to eat the yogurt, bagel or omelet breakfasts I have known my entire life! I can mix and match. I can use left overs! I can be in any part of the world I want to be on any morning I choose! Gotta love that!


Now I'd like to know who eats what for breakfast. Be part of my survey. I love to be educated and pass it along! I am curious to know what else is out there for breakfast and what culture it comes from. What do you eat first thing in the morning? Please feel free to comment!

Flake Disease

Flaking out drives me completly out of my mind! I can't stand it! First it's yes. Then it's no. Sometimes it's "I never said that." At others, it's "I said "What? When? Noooo wayyyyy."

Anyway you put it....what a pain in the butt it is to deal with flaky people. Living with one is for sure the road to the looney tune bin! A typical day with a flake-r can mean a day of ups and downs enough to never make you want to never-ever ride a see-saw or a merry go-round AGAIN! It can seriously kill the spontanity of living. Especially if you believe the flake. You get all excited. You make plans. Then.....whooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... "Where did you get that idea?" "Huh? What? You said........." And the vicious cycle starts all over again. So much wasted energy. Arrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....going coo-koo, coo-koo.

Finally, one day you don't believe the flake-r anymore. It's like the little boy who cried wolf over and over again. No ONE ever believes a flake-r once they prove themselves to have no word.

"Say what you mean and mean what you say " goes a real long way in gauging someone's opinion of who you are. Words, regardless of the "intention" with which they are spoken, with NO action to back them up mean absolutely nothing. The only impression left by a flake-r over time is that they can never be counted upon. Their words are empty. Leading other's to believe the madness is not theirs but truly yours for repeatedly listening to the flake-r.

Beware, Rudeness on Board

Rudeness. Ack! Another one of those things that drives me batty. Rude people, rude comments, rude manners, rude, rude, rude. And I don't mean the once in a while "I'm irrated, what the *&$^ do you want? Forgive me if I'm having a rude moment" kind of rudeness. I am talking about the RUDENESS that seems to exist today. Goodness. I know we all have bad days. I know I do. And I know I too am rude from time to time, but it's not a habit.

I know people and places where rudeness is the norm. I'm sure some of you do too. Don't you hate it? Is it really so difficult to be nice? polite? use a kind word? Doesn't it take much more energy to be rude? I think so. I know personally, when I am nice, polite and/or considerate, I not only get a better response, I feel good about me. The worst part about rudeness is when it is not the norm for you but you find yourself responding with rudeness. Innnnnsannnneeeeeeeee!

Besides, being rude is wrong. Just wrong. No one likes it. Not even rude people! Crazy isn't it? Crazy that it seems right to treat others wrong. Crazy to believe that by being rude we made a point when all we simply did was make ourselves look like a fool.

How often do you run into NASTY clothing inventory with brand new tags on it.

Isn't that nasty? When you try an item of clothing on in a Major or any for that matter, ANY store and there are things like BOOGERS on it!? Ewwwwwwwwww. NASSTYYY! Haven't people ever heard of tissue paper? Waiting to get some? NOT blowing their nose when they AREN'T suppose to???? Ewwwwwwwwwwwww....NASTYYYY! AND I....got the honor of recently trying one of these items on! TADA...hence my madness at the moment.

Anyhow, I try it on. Happy! Happy me! It fits, it's perfect, ON SALE! Deal. I'll take it. Off I go to hunt some more. Happier than happy. Finally with the hunt over I go off to find the nearest cashier and pay for my treasures. Plop! All the items onto the counter top. As per habit, I scan the item real well to check for damages, missing buttons, etc. AND WHAT DO I FIND??? OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!!! BOOOOGGERSSSSSSSS....EWWWWWWWWWWWW! "Look" I tell the cashier! "What nasty people. AND ewwwwwwww...I put it on." I quickly start to shake myself off like it matters at this point. The boogers have already landed and are sure to be on me! I am beyond disgusted, I need a bath! Gag. Nasty! Don't you hate that? I know I am not alone in the "booger surprise of your new clothes club". Poor cashier, not only was she not surprised, she agreed there were MANY nasty people who come through these stores. Shame.

Drives me crazy though I know there is little that can really be done about the matter. It is bound to happen and I'm sure if all of us where to inspect our purchases a wee bit better, we'd see why it is so necessary to wash things before you wear them, even if they are new. Sadly, some people forget that it is important to seriously keep their cooties to themselves.

Have your own cootie story? Make a comment or two. I'd love to know what ARE cooties to you?

Home Depot Shipping Madness...

It's crazy I tell you. Absolutely nuts. I purchased a sink via special order for my guestbath from our local "Home Depot Expo Design" center. Everything went fairly smooth. My order placed strickly out of a catalog and some faith on my part as they had no sample. No problem-o. My order's pretty simple. A plain bowl. Bone color. Nothing fancy. Nothing "special" other than the order. I can deal with no visual. "Return policy please? "Why yes, 15% restocking charge." Hmmmm. Gotta get a sink, so...ok...done. Ordered.

Next question, "How long before I can get my sink?" "Ahh, 2 weeks." Whhhaat??? 2 weeks? I have no sink. Nothing. 2 weeks? I see. "Can I get it delivered to my home?" And the answer came..."Yes, for $35 and no guarantee for breakage, plus 2 weeks transit time." "What? What's the difference between shipping to me undamaged and shipping to your store undamaged? You won't believe your ears! "The difference is we have to pull it for you sooner." "HUHHH?" Ok. I'm not going to argue. It seems the clerk is in a hurry to get back to her chit chatting with co-workers. "Ahh, another question please. What if I get it overnighted to my house, what is the cost?" READY??? "$200 for UPS Ground Overnight $175 3-day" WHHHHAAAATTT??? Then this from the already very impatient clerk "Are you going to do it because I already (pointing out the order) printed it out!" "No, that is ridiculous. NO thanks, I will wait."

Worse still, a phone call to customer (Skip was his name) service at headquarters yielded little more than "I will speak to the clerk about this." TADA!! Bad service WITH more bad service.. so here I sit ...waiting for my sink...2 weeks from now. Absurd.

Crazy day, crazy world...

Day to day, the crazy things I hear and see are enough to send you to the looney tune bin pronto!

In recent local neighborhood buzz... old man watering lawn, gets mugged by the men with shotguns in the middle of a Saturday morning...crazzzzzzzzzzzyyyyyy....wrong

More local news, every day in the neighborhood an old man rides his bike being careful to protect himself from the sun by doning a hat, long sleeves and pants...yet...a cigar hangs from his mouth as he puffs out smoke inbetween his pedaling...inSANEEEEEEEEEEEEEee.... AND NO they are not the same old man and NO, this is not a bad neighborhood..

Now for some real madness....there has now been a "PERFECT WOMAN" invented. Set to launch on June 11th AND to be followed by the "PERFECT MAN" coming soon! The movie "Stepford Wives" quickly comes to mind.....Creeeeeeeeeeeepppppyyyyyy crazzzzzzzzyyy!

Finally, the best kind of nuttiness I can think of, the kind that makes me laugh and maybe you too. A man, who is apparently quite broke, has decided to put one NUT! up for sale. Asking bid: US $5000.00. Seems that this kind of mental illness believes one nut is better than two especailly if the other one can help pay for therapy!

I now return you to your own crazy day...world....

Killer is going to KILL me..

Here's my lovely little doggie Killer. When we first saw him, he was barely 6 weeks old and belonged to someone else. Lucas, his original name, all 5 inches of him or so were soooo adorable. Awwwweeeeee. "What kind of doggie is he? A Miniture Pincher. "Really? Full breed? Does he have any sibilings? Any others like him for sale?" No? Awwwwwwweeeee. Shame. Fastforward 3 months. Lucas is back at my front door. This time his owner has a question. "Listen, we can't keep the dog, blah, blah, blah, would you like to buy him from me?" Ahh,sure. Deal. I got the doggie, I got the doggie! His name is now KILLER!! Went out got a book, got the dog to the vet, made it a comfty home. Aweeee,soooo cute,so cuddly.

Shortly thereafter, as with most marraiges, the love affair began to change. While Killer (my little escape artist) is still the love of our household, the 3 or so times he has managed to escape has found us wondering for hours, knocking on doors (cause we NEED him home) even though it turns out he is quite a untiring, high-jumping, yappie lil doggie. And while he does indeed make a great watch dog(Yes, really, better than any alarm you'll ever have), he is also a bundle of yap. And he does not give up! If he wants attention or has a desire to be let in the house. He will, for as long as you allow him to, jump up against the glass doors barking until you give in!! No amount of "Killer, hush, be quiet." will suffice. He is worst than any baby I ever raised!

I will admit at first I thought it was cute. "Ohhhh look. He can jump really high! Oh my and he is so determined to get what he wants. Sooo cute". But cute has now become annoying. I love my Killer, I really do. And I want him around a long, long time. Yet, all the yapping is driving me nuts....poor Killer, he doesn't even know he's making me insane.

I guess I just have to laugh...and keep on shhhhh-ushing my lil doggie Killer...what else can I do?